How To Deal With Depression When Mourning The Death Of A Loved One

By Allen S. Fox


Are you filled with despair and emptiness? Has life lost its meaning for you, and no one could possibly understand your feelings? Do you believe there is no future without your loved one? It is likely, if you are feeling this way that you are suffering from what is often called normal reactive depression. You are down and reacting because something or someone you cherish is gone.We are not talking here about clinical or biochemical depression, although reactive depression can evolve into the clinical type. Depression from the loss of a loved one usually does not require medication, although in some instances it is prescribed, and is useful on a temporary basis. Here is what you need to know.

Not everyone gets depressed after the death of a loved one. It is perfectly normal not to suffer depression as it is to have to deal with it. However, after the death of a loved one, thoughts and attitudes often trigger loneliness and resulting depression, which occurs early in grieving. It features confusion, little motivation, altered self-esteem, lack of meaning, reduced functioning in one's social circle, insomnia, and low energy. If you are depressed, acknowledge it. Describe it in detail, where it hurts, and what it feels like. "What is the message or messages this emotion is delivering to me?" is an important question to address. What do I need to accept? To let go of? The refusal to accept the loss is often a root cause of depression. Depending on what you believe about your depression will lead to choices that either help you manage it, or prolong it.

While supplements may not be a good idea for an elder, due to drug/herb interactions, aromatherapy could be useful. The essential oils of chamomile and lavender are considered particularly useful. If the elder needs mental stimulation, oil of peppermint is another good product. On the oil of peppermint, be sure to keep children under the age of two away from this oil. Just the scent can cause serious breathing problems.Depression can be beaten, but only if it's recognized. Look for symptoms and start treatment as soon as possible for the best results.Most people will admit that their acne problem is making them depressed, however small that depression is. Yes, most people are suffering from chronic stress when they have acne sitting all day on their face. It's a natural reaction. You cannot be blamed for your depression because of acne, and it is certainly right for you to experience stress because of acne.

Find a symbol of comfort and guidance. Create a symbol that will bring back loving memories of the person who died and/or of your Higher Power who is with you at all times, and will help you through your great loss. Keep the symbol in a place where you will see it often and use it as a cue to think of loving memories--and to accept the new conditions of life.Are deep seated negative beliefs (I can't go on alone, I'm being punished, I'm never going to feel better, I'm worthless, etc.) adding to your depression? Regain your power. Take it back from those beliefs that say you are less and not more. Believe you can get well. Create opposing affirmations and keep repeating them throughout the day.

Start learning to tolerate uncertainty. This can be accomplished by turning toward your spiritual and symbolic beliefs. You will increase your options by letting your spiritual beliefs guide you and strengthen your faith that you will get through this hurtful loss. Know what you can and cannot control. You can control how you deal with major changes; you cannot control what others say and do or what has already happened.

Men may not discuss the way they are feeling with anyone, and may not recognize the changes themselves. As a result of societal conditioning, they tend not to talk about their stress with their friends, unlike women, who tend to get support from other women.And the impact their depression can have on their family life and primary relationships is often nothing short of devastating.Strategies for Helping A Depressed Man,First, if you notice that a man you care about is depressed, don't beat him over the head with your observations; be careful how you approach the subject, or you may make your relationship problems worse. You might try sharing your concern with him, mentioning that you have noticed one or two of his symptoms. Go gently ...and see if you can get him to open up about how he's feeling. Express your concern. Avoid being critical. Don't blame. Just listen and tell him how concerned you are.

Check your eating habits and whether you have an insufficiency of amino acids. Protein consumption at all three meals can affect neurotransmitters and your energy levels. Reduce carbohydrate (not complex carbs), sugar, alcohol, and fast food consumption, and increase fruits and vegetables. The way you feel physically will add to or detract from depression.Whenever you feel depression creeping back in, immediately ask yourself this key question, "What are my choices here?" If you are burying your feelings and not facing them, depression is a common result.

Counseling,If you are in an intimate relationship with a depressed partner, it is often best to seek counseling. It is much easier and more effective to sit down with a trained relationship professional to discuss your relationship problems.Counseling is one of the best ways to face and deal with depression. It can be just as effective as medication, if not more so. The combination of the two can be even more effective.Sometimes depression can become quite serious and lead to other mental health issues. It is best to take it seriously.Depression and Your Relationship,Without a doubt, the depression of one spouse can injure the other. And it can have a derogatory impact upon the relationship in general, giving both partners a sense of despair, and causing them to view the relationship in pessimistic terms.

We know that depression can be a serious illness for some unfortunate people, who seem to go through life suffering from it no matter what. For those of us who have just ended a relationship though, this kind of depression will not last and it's important that we realize this.Dealing with depression after a breakup can be more difficult if you do not occupy yourself and find out that you have too much time on your hands. When we are not occupied in this way we tend to reflect too much and this can lead to us wallowing in self-despair. There is nothing wrong in trying to remember the good times, but at times like these it just helps to aggravate our feelings of insecurity, loneliness and sadness.

If you have been in a very long-term relationship you feel as if you have a significant gap in your life after you break up. It's that empty feeling that can help to fuel depression, but it's important that you be proactive if you're to cut short an extended period of healing. Can you get involved in other pastimes, or interact with different friends or other acquaintances who may not directly remind you of your ex? Maybe it's time for you to take up another hobby or pastime, but any way you look at it, it's important that you try and occupy your time as much as possible.Don't beat yourself up over whatever has happened. If your relationship truly is over, then you should try and part company on good terms and there may well be time for you to foster a good friendship with your ex in the future. There again, after a period of reflection both of you might believe that there is something to be salvaged here and you might find that you are both stronger as a consequence of this traumatic period of your life.Depression can appear to be all-consuming and no matter what you try and do you might not think that you can shake it. Always remember that time heals everything, including depression and the most important thing that you can do is to occupy your time as best you can with positive and nurturing experiences. Remember that everything is fixable and that if you maintain as positive an outlook as you can, then strength will carry you through this.




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